Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
Thursday, October 4, 2012
On Words...
I am a writer and right now, I cannot find the words for the feelings I have going through me. Thinking about it, it's probably because sometimes, there are no words... just feelings... a look in the eye and touch of the hand, the smile on your lovers lips.
To try and put those feelings into words would perhaps diminish them somehow. Make them less vibrant and one dimensional.
For a long time now, I have been living day to day, not really thinking too much about the future, just knowing it was out there and eventually I would get to it. But I had nothing to look forward to. Simply *just living,* isn't really enough. It's a sad and lonely way to spend your days and nights, only I had no idea just how lonely I had become. Not until I realized how truly happy I could be.
The past few months gave me little glimpses into a future I could be happy in. But I wasn't sure how to get to that future. My normal M.O. is to rush, hurry, mangle and maul my way to what I would like in my life, but for the first time, I simply waited. Patience has never been my strong suit and yet, patience is what was required and I listened to my instinct. That little voice that is never wrong told me to just wait.
I have always believed in the Once Upon a Time fairy tales - I knew there was a Prince Charming to kiss me awake again. With patience, with care, with love, I was woken up.
The past few days have shown me what that waiting was for and it was worth every minute of that wait. To try and describe the happiness I feel, the love the fills my heart and the joy I have in picturing a future where I am not alone, it just can't be described. This cannot be captured in mere words. But when your heart sings the same song as the person you love, there are no need for any words.
~C
To try and put those feelings into words would perhaps diminish them somehow. Make them less vibrant and one dimensional.
For a long time now, I have been living day to day, not really thinking too much about the future, just knowing it was out there and eventually I would get to it. But I had nothing to look forward to. Simply *just living,* isn't really enough. It's a sad and lonely way to spend your days and nights, only I had no idea just how lonely I had become. Not until I realized how truly happy I could be.
The past few months gave me little glimpses into a future I could be happy in. But I wasn't sure how to get to that future. My normal M.O. is to rush, hurry, mangle and maul my way to what I would like in my life, but for the first time, I simply waited. Patience has never been my strong suit and yet, patience is what was required and I listened to my instinct. That little voice that is never wrong told me to just wait.
I have always believed in the Once Upon a Time fairy tales - I knew there was a Prince Charming to kiss me awake again. With patience, with care, with love, I was woken up.
The past few days have shown me what that waiting was for and it was worth every minute of that wait. To try and describe the happiness I feel, the love the fills my heart and the joy I have in picturing a future where I am not alone, it just can't be described. This cannot be captured in mere words. But when your heart sings the same song as the person you love, there are no need for any words.
~C
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Making Things Happen...
There is a saying that if you really want something all you need to do is imagine it, picture it, want it badly enough and make it so.
But, what if what you want isn't supposed to be...
I have a freakishly good imagination, so by my sheer will alone, I can wish for anything and it just happens? Even if it's not meant to be? Will whatever I am wishing for alter to fit what is supposed to happen - that by my will alone it becomes the "right thing?"
These opposing conditions confuse me. I understand the idea and I know the power of both positive and negative thinking, but what if, what you are wishing for, bumps up against the free will of another? I never wish for something that may not be in the best interest of another person, that just isn't playing fair and things usually end up badly when someone does that.
So, even if I wish for something and add "only if it is in the best interest for myself and all involved..." it still seems full of conflict. Maybe I am missing something, but the statement "go and make it happen if you want it badly enough," can't really work as it is... unless I use a lot of begging, smiles or maybe some duck tape. ;)
Just methinks...
~C
Talk Like a Pirate Day - My Pirate Name (Arrrrrgh)
My pirate name is:
Dread Pirate Rackham
Like the famous Dread Pirate Roberts, you have a keen head for how to make a profit. You have the good fortune of having a good name, since Rackham (pronounced RACKem, not rack-ham) is one of the coolest sounding surnames for a pirate. Arr!
Get your own pirate name from piratequiz.com.part of the fidius.org network
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Memories: On Remembering
I was thinking about memories this morning. Sometimes, thinking back to a time or a place, people that were in your life, those memories can bring smiles, tears, even laughter. Sweet or bittersweet, memories can be one or the other, or both.
After my brother died, I had a lot of memories, and at that time, none of them were good. Most were linked to his death and the aftermath of dealing with what was left for us. I thought I would never get past that hurt and those terrible days of confusion and questions never answered and the memories they left.
But after awhile, those memories faded... and left me with my brother again. The actual person he was, not the way his death left me feeling. I could smile again and remember, not the hurt, but the person my little brother was. It was such a relief to leave those negative memories behind, let them go and remember the good, the smiles, the happy times.
I think, for me, memories should be of the people we are remembering, the good in them, the way they made us feel, the way they lived. Once you pass a certain point, you can choose to let go of the hurt and the loss and embrace the goodness of the memories. Otherwise, you stagnate and remain in a place of darkness. In that darkness, you can't grow and you can't heal or move on.
Letting go of the darkness, moving on with light...
~C
And no, my brother didn't die in 9/11 - I was just making an observation about memories...
After my brother died, I had a lot of memories, and at that time, none of them were good. Most were linked to his death and the aftermath of dealing with what was left for us. I thought I would never get past that hurt and those terrible days of confusion and questions never answered and the memories they left.
But after awhile, those memories faded... and left me with my brother again. The actual person he was, not the way his death left me feeling. I could smile again and remember, not the hurt, but the person my little brother was. It was such a relief to leave those negative memories behind, let them go and remember the good, the smiles, the happy times.
I think, for me, memories should be of the people we are remembering, the good in them, the way they made us feel, the way they lived. Once you pass a certain point, you can choose to let go of the hurt and the loss and embrace the goodness of the memories. Otherwise, you stagnate and remain in a place of darkness. In that darkness, you can't grow and you can't heal or move on.
Letting go of the darkness, moving on with light...
~C
And no, my brother didn't die in 9/11 - I was just making an observation about memories...
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