A Funny - Realistic Living in the 21st Century

realistic living in the 21st century 

 

1 - Sometimes you have to hurt the ones you love. Otherwise, they just wont do what you want them to do.

 

2 - Two wrongs don't make a right. But if that second "wrong" is about getting revenge and you can get away with it, then its not a "wrong" at all, and is really a "right." So that's not two wrongs.

 

3- When you're sad because someone you loved has died, just remember that his or her death really isn't the end. They still live on in your memories. At least until you die, which will be the absolute end for both of you.

 

4- If God existed, He'd love you as much as He loves any one of us silly people. But He doesn't exist, there's no reason for anything and no heaven. When we die, we just disintegrate. It's too bad really...

 

5- You often don't know how much you have... until some drug crazed freak tries to steal it and you have to shoot him in the back as he is heading out your door with a bag full of your stuff you took for granted. So now you appreciate what you have but you've also just killed a man.

 

6 - Sex is not necessarily bad, as long as you're doing it with the right person - someone you love and are committed to. If you're really, really enjoying it, then it's probably not with the right person.

 

7- Loyalty especially to family, is the one absolute virtue. That's why if a relative commits a heinous crime, we will send him on a ski trip to Europe to avoid prosecution. It's just the right thing to do.

 

8- Old people should be revered. That's why we put the extra house in a trust fund so we wont have to sell it to pay for gramma and grandpas nursing home.

 

9- Love means never having to say you're sorry, no matter how angry you were or what you broke or how loudly she screamed for help.

 

10 - Money isn't everything. It just helps you get everything. What's really important is your health because it's illegal to buy someone else's organs.